Wednesday 26 November 2014

A tale of two babies

Or why following Gina Ford is pointless...
  

People say each baby is different. And then there's the whole nature vs nurture debate. Well the proof is in the pudding (or the baby in this case) and my family is living proof - it's all down to the baby. 

"I don't want to take after you!"

So whatever parenting strategy you are stressing about employing this week... Don't worry. Relax. Your baby will do whatever they were going to do regardless :)
 
"Sshhhh listen, don't tell them but this is how it's done..."

Breastfeeding

D had a nightmare establishing breastfeeding due to undiagnosed tongue tie (read about it here) and was a super scrawny baby as a result, falling across 3 centiles. Iz is a little chuffalump with no problems feeding, latched on in the delivery room and is already over 7kg at 3 months! 

Same age, same feeding strategy... look at the difference!

D always fed every 2-3 hours, including through the night, right up til he was weaned and was perfectly happy to "snack" anytime boob was offered. Iz actually refuses boob if she's not hungry and prefers to feed 4 hourly. She's even gone 10 hours overnight without a feed already.

D's feeds lasted hours. And hours. Iz sometimes takes her time but other days will happily feed for 5 minutes every 4 hours and get enough from that.


Sleeping

D liked sleeping on his side, Iz prefers her back. D had to be kept swaddled til he was 5 months as he just couldn't sleep without it. Iz already regularly breaks free from hers and still continues sleeping.

"I want to break freeeeee"

And as for that elusive sleeping-through-the-night? As I said above, D woke regularly for feeds all through the night until he was fully weaned and aged 2 still wakes at least once or twice each night for a drink of water. That section in his baby book asking "date I first slept through the night"...? Yep, still blank! Iz on the other hand has already slept 10pm-7am on several occasions. I'm not saying she's perfect at all (last night for example she was up til 5am) but for my 3 month old to do that? I'm impressed :)


Temperament

I think this one is tricky as D had 100% undivided attention from me whereas Iz has to compete for it. But D (from memory) had a much more "even" mood - he was always pretty smiley. Iz on the other hand can do the most heart-crumblingly sad bottom lip tremor and the most heart-piercing screaming. But also has the best baby chuckle ever. Maybe a boy/girl thing? Am I allowed to think that, let alone say it?! Or a first/second child thing? Who knows.

******

Could any two babies be more different? I don't think so! So what are their similarities?

They both model leg warmers well:


They both look cute in the same PJs:


And they do both have crazy big heads. But at least they had the decency to grow from the 50th to > 99th centile *after* birth... ;)

******

So you may wonder what I did differently second time round. What things did I change to try and improve on last time? To be brutally honest, nothing. For all the sleepless nights I think Doof is pretty perfect and I wouldn't change anything about him. So with Iz we employed the exact same wing-it-with-no-routine style of parenting, offered her boob whenever I (or she) felt like it, fed her to sleep, used babywearing if she wouldn't sleep in her cot etc etc etc. All those *awful* props you get told will break your baby... Yet still she slept through at 3 months.

We'll have to see what happens about weaning (Doof was ace at it) and nursery settling (not D's strongest point initially although he loves it now...). 

******

So what's the moral?

If you followed Gina Ford and your baby slept through from 2 days old, don't be too smug... It was probably due to your baby, not Gina.
 
Which will you get? Luck of the draw...

And if your baby/toddler/child has *never* slept through the night (ahem, not looking at anyone Doofy...) then don't despair. Your second child may be a whole different (nicer!) ball game... (thanks Iz!).

Little cuties :)

6 comments:

  1. Love this so much, it is all so very true! Gorgeous pics too. And so pleased (not really pleased but you know what I mean) that your oldest doesn't sleep - I thought we were alone that our 20 month old doesn't (and her big brother did from four months)!

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    1. Thank you :) and glad we can celebrate our kids sleeplessness together! Lol. At least mine did it the right way round... Bad first sleeper meant I had very low expectations for number 2 ;)

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  2. Trying again for the THIRD time haha.

    Love love love this post! Thanks for sharing such precious photos with us :-)
    I know a couple of people who like old Gina and recommended her to me when Tia was really young. Needress to say her book ended up in the bin before I had finished the first chapter. I was horrified! So we've "winged" it for over two years now, and we're all still alive and kicking so must be doing something right. X

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    1. Aww thank you for persisting with your comment!! Lol. Yep I think most parents are pretty good at winging it if they just trusted themselves more. Good for you knowing what was right for you and Tia. And looks like you're doing a pretty fab job so far :) x

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  3. This is so interesting to read. My 7m old has slept through the night since 9 weeks and eats anything we give her. I know damn well it's nothing to do with what we've done as parents - it's pure luck of the draw. I'm making the most of it as I know the next one (if there is one) could be totally different!!

    Jenna at Tinyfootsteps xx

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    1. Haha Jenna, will keep my fingers crossed that if you have a number 2 they are just as good ;)

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