Thursday, 22 January 2015

Dear Grumpy Old Man on the bus

Dear Grumpy Old Man on the bus

Thank you for your invaluable help today. Indeed I could actually hear my baby crying before you pointed it out to me.

The fact that I had already heard you muttering and complaining about the noise to your neighbour did not enamour you to me.

Thank you for having no clue what was wrong with my baby but still managing to suggest things that would "definitely work". And for repeatedly commenting that "he" had a good set of lungs.

I know you think I'm an awful mother because I didn't give her a dummy the moment she started crying. And an even worse mum that (shock horror) she's never used a dummy so I didn't have one with me. Even after I explained that, thank you for continuing to repeat that I needed to give her a dummy and why wasn't I...

You know, I'd never even thought of stroking her or trying to comfort her until you suggested it. Or maybe your eyesight is really bad or you would've realised I'd been doing nothing else for the preceding few minutes. 

And thank you for imparting that magic secret that all mums need to know - the one thing that is guaranteed to always work and stop your child crying, whatever the cause - rubbing their tummy. I’m really glad that always worked when you were a baby. And your mother was certainly lucky to have a one-thing-fixes-all-ills cure. I'm sorry I didn't try it on her after you suggested it but she was tired and hungry. If you're tired and hungry I doubt you want someone poking your tummy.

I know it's shocking I've managed to raise 2 children thus far without your invaluable advice... But I have.

So Grumpy Old Man on the bus, next time you hear a child crying and want to share your pearls of wisdom... just butt out. *That* is the most helpful thing you can do for that mother.


Yours lovingly 


  1. Oh don't you just love it when complete strangers give you such 'helpful' advice? I can never understand why some people think they know what your baby needs better than you do. Great response though.

    1. I know, how did we cope before they came along? Lol. I've since had a few good suggestions on Twitter for more choice responses should it happen again ;) thanks for commenting x